The Approval Addiction

Once upon a time, a man visited Lord Buddha and asked him “ What is the price of human life? What is the worth of my life?”

Lord Buddha smiled and rather gave him a shining stone and said “First go and discover the worth of this stone. However, do not sell the stone at any cost”

The man got puzzled but without saying anything took that stone and took off to the market. First, he went to an Orange Seller and inquired about the worth of the stone. Orange seller replied, “I will give a dozen oranges in exchange for the stone.”

The man moved on and then went to a vegetable vendor and asked him the same question. The vendor shouted, “Take a sack of potatoes and leave this shiny stone.”

Next, he went to a goldsmith and showed him the stone. Goldsmith, stunned by the shine of the stone, said “Sell me this stone for 10000 gems”. Kishore refused this offer. Goldsmith readily conceded to pay him a further 500,000 gems.

Finally, he went to a diamond merchant and showed him the stone. When the diamond merchant saw this beautiful, shining stone, he could not believe his eyes. Mesmerized by the beauty of stone, the diamond merchant first laid down a red velvet cloth and then placed that stone on it and bowed before it. Finally, he asked him, “Where did you find this precious Ruby stone? Even after auctioning the whole world, we can’t calculate the worth of this ruby stone. This is priceless and invaluable.”

With the mixture of experience, the surprised man went straight back to Lord Buddha. He then narrated his story to Buddha and reiterated his question “What is the worth of human life?”

Buddha replied, “ Orange seller quoted 12 oranges, the Vegetable vendor said one sack of potatoes, goldsmith valued the stone at 500,000 gems and finally diamond merchant cited it as invaluable. The same is valid for human life. You are invaluable but people around you will value you according to their status, knowledge, and capacity.”

We are each unique and extraordinary individuals and so is our journey of life. Obtaining approval for who we are and what we do feels nice but being a people-pleaser and constantly striving for validation makes us live in bondage, and on other people’s terms. We ultimately waste our potential and feel emotionally drained.

So my takeaway from today’s post is —

Let’s focus on living our values and do what feels right and true to heart. We have all the answers within us. We barely need to activate our intuition and follow our conscience. When we approve of our being and doing, we quit asking people to certify our worth.

Originally published at https://wisdomekta.blogspot.com.